STOP SMOKING!!!!

I have been thinking lately alot about smoking! How it is an addiction and how I feel right now and I would so much like to start it up again. I work in a Hotel where my managers smoke and at least 7/10 of the bar staff smoke as well. I am the only one in our group that doesnt smoke at the minute. It is crazy and very hard. I used to smoke when I was 12 till I was about 17 but i would still and have smoked one or two cigs on a night out.

This last week I have been so stressed through work and through whats going on in my head that I have very nearly taken it up again.

It is hard to be at work when others are smoking and it is hard for me since i used to smoke. I am in a weird place as my gran has lung problems from smoking and is on inhaillers and she is trying to stop so she can live a little longer. I dont want to really start again but when I was stressed the other day and couldnt drink caused i was driving i so wanted to smoke.

SMOKING BAN!!! In scotland on the 26th of March there will be NO smoking in public places, anywhere in scotland at all, pubs, clubs, shopping centres, cafes, any where...It will be so good, I know that I wont need to feel like I need a Cig then...but it is the now and the here that I am so needing to come over. It is bad I know.

This picture is what I would smoke most of the time right now. JOINTS

I find it easier to smoke dope and put my life to the back...There is so much pain in me that I cant deal with it... A joint makes it simple and takes my worries away. BUT only for a while.

Perhaps one day I will stop this and stop craving cigs themselfs and be able to see my world through open, clear eyes, not hazed weery ones.

'dont worry about tommoro, for tomorow brings enough worries of its own, live for today.'